The Ego

Wednesday nights I meet with a meditation group in a Yoga studio. It is led by an ER doctor who is very zen and does a great job helping everyone relax. In the beginning he spoke about love. How we have the power to transfer love and energy from us to someone else and back. He gave an example of his dog. How when he is in the present moment with her and really enjoying her he can feel the love radiate from her to him and back. It's a good lesson in living completely in the present.

It was a bit more difficult for me to relax during my meditation this time. I had a lot on my mind. I was feeling guilty for only getting to spend an hour with my son before the class. I felt like I had a lot to do at home and at work. A co-worker's wife was diagnosed with cancer recently so I was thinking about that. I just couldn't relax. I guess you could say it was difficult to be in the present moment.
Knowing what I know about the ego, I was sure it was rearing its ugly head. For those that are not familiar, the ego is that voice inside that tries to keep you down, negative, and fearful. We all have it. Christine Arylo calls it your inner mean girl. When we choose love, we also choose to turn away from the ego. This is difficult for me and I found the ego to manifest itself into my legs that night. As I was trying feverishly to clear my head, I started to feel great amounts of energy in my legs. Think Restless Leg Syndrome. I felt I had to move them or walk around. It was a very strong feeling. Luckily, the 20 minutes were over and I was able to relax again (funny to relax AFTER the meditation). I shared my meditation with the group. Dr.Chris pointed out that I was probably right that my emotions and feelings had taken hold of my body. He pointed out that we all have 'inner demons' and the point is not to release them into the world but to bring them out into our consciousness and be aware of them and deal with them. Whether it's your inner demons, mean girl, ego, feelings, emotions, or fears, it is always beneficial to be honest with yourself, be aware of them, and deal with them. Meditation is a great way to bring things to the surface (as I did that night) and I find Tapping to be a great way to get rid of them. I will get into Tapping with Jessica Ortner in my next post.

Until then, live, love, and expect miracles!

I love this picture of Gabby meditating! Even in our fast paced lives, we should still find time for peace.